Chess Tournament Survival Tips for Parents

“Please, can I go, Dad? I really want to go!” Your kid has been going to chess club for a few months, and they really enjoy it. Straight off the school bus, they thrust a sheet of paper into your hand. It reads: “CHESS TOURNAMENT SIGN-UP.”

Chess tournaments can be an exciting addition to your child’s chess journey. They provide opportunities to grow and learn beyond the mechanics of chess, requiring independence, self-confidence, and sportsmanship. Whether your player does well at the board or not, tournaments can help them prepare for the challenges of life—a win for any kid!

Things to Consider Before Registering for a Kids Chess Tournament

To start with, you may need to find the right tournament. There are lots of options available now, both online and in-person. The US Chess Upcoming Tournaments website will give you links to all the tournaments close to home (use the keywords “scholastic” or “kids” to get events that welcome young players). You might be surprised at the options available. (We will focus on in-person events here.)

READ THE ENTIRE EVENT DESCRIPTION. Some events welcome unrated players, others don’t. Some require USCF membership. All have specific venue rules that must be followed. Before you register and pay any fees, make sure that your player is eligible for the tournament and that the rules are acceptable to you.

You know your kid best. A casual player with a developing grasp of the rules probably wouldn’t have a great time at a formal three-day event with multiple chess matches. They may have a blast at an afternoon tournament with other learners. It may be the reverse for your avid chess player with a rating. If you’re not sure if a particular tournament is right for your kid, email the organizer or talk to other experienced chess parents or coaches.

Preparing Your Kid to Have a Positive Experience

Talking to experienced chess parents, the main thing they emphasize is that tournaments are conducted without parents present. That means your player needs to be comfortable raising questions of rules and/or advocating their position independently.

Because the decision of the director or arbiter is final, you should practice and reinforce the following:

• Be knowledgeable about the tournament rules and when to enforce them.
• Be comfortable articulating their position whether they are asking for the review or their move is being reviewed.
• Accept the outcome, even if it isn’t in their favor. (This one goes for parents, too.)

Read all of the tournament information before you arrive, and be on time. Make sure you have time to find parking and check-in before your kid needs to be at the board. A late arrival can result in a frazzled kid or a forfeiture, neither of which start your day right.

If you’re traveling, try to get your kid a good night’s sleep before the tournament. That may mean bringing a favorite pillow, arriving a little earlier, or adjusting for time zone changes at home. Follow a routine that helps your player feel at home for those all-important hours of rest.

Try not to load your kid up with expectations, whether yours or their own. Sadly, some kids feel so much pressure to do well at tournaments that they abandon chess altogether as “not fun” and “too stressful.” We all want our children to succeed, but defining success in chess as “winning tournaments” is short-sighted. Chess tournaments are opportunities to grow as a person, working hard at something and playing through the highs and lows. Define success as doing your best and celebrate that!

Essential Things to Pack for A Chess Tournament

SNACKS. Say it with me: PACK SNACKS. Kids use a lot of energy concentrating for the amount of time required in a game, and a hungry kid will not be at their best in any way. Most venues have limited options for food and drinks, and you won’t want to resort to a day full of sugar because that’s all you can find. Same goes for drinks.

There is downtime at tournaments between games, and schedules change. Have a favorite activity available for that time, preferably something that can be done close to the tournament room. Some players like to play informal games with new friends, others choose to go outside and throw a ball around. Something that provides a mental break and an opportunity to relax will help them head to the next game fresh and ready to go.

Of course, every player should bring their own board, pieces, and clock just in case. Some tournaments provide equipment, and some do not. Check the tournament specifics beforehand to see if it’s required, and then pack it anyway! This combination set has everything your player needs to be tournament ready. Even if they don’t need it for official games, it’s nice to have handy for a fun game with a friend.

Sitting and Waiting

For many parents, the most nerve-wracking part of chess tournaments is sitting outside the venue and waiting. Parents are not allowed in the room to avoid distraction and possible interference with play. The best thing you can do while your player is battling over the board is stay calm. Your kid will take cues from you.

Be prepared for a range of situations and outcomes that have been resolved before you know about them. Things can happen at chess tournaments that are sub-optimal, both in rules decisions and play. The tournament director or an arbiter will have ruled on the question, and results are final. You prepared your player to advocate for themself, so trust that everyone has done their best with the information they had.

If you need to bring work with you, check to make sure there’s Wi-Fi or plan to work offline. Many parents bring a book to read. Bring your headphones or ear buds and catch up on a favorite show. It may be tempting to get on the internet and dive into chess research, but your player may need a minute to decompress when they’re done. Save the download for later.

Things To Do After the Chess Tournament

No one can predict the outcome of the tournament for your kid ahead of time. Very good players can have a bad day and blunder, and developing players can have a brilliant day and shine. Your reaction will influence how your kid feels about chess and future tournaments.

If your kid had a rough day, don’t launch into a post-mortem examination of every mistake immediately. Let them know you’re proud of their effort and provide some time for the emotion of the day to process. There will be time to study the games later. Of course, celebrate those wins as they excitedly recount every detail!

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No matter what kind of day your kid had, plan to do something relaxing if possible. If you’re traveling, schedule a visit to a local attraction or fun activity. It will help burn off any residual nervous energy and make trips even more fun.

If you’re at home, maybe your player would appreciate a favorite treat, or the chance to see a friend. Some players may prefer to go home and take a nap—that’s perfectly fine, too! After a full day or even several days of chess, a few hours of anything they enjoy makes sense.

Every Tournament Is a Win

Whether you’re celebrating a victory or a learning experience, chess tournaments are always opportunities to grow as a player and a person. With a little preparation, you can set the stage for both you and your child to have a great day. Your chess kid might find their competitive spirit is ignited—or they might just have fun. With chess, it’s all good!

Additional Resources

For more helpful advice, check out this guide from the Illinois Chess Association: Guide to Scholastic Chess Tournaments